The "New" New Year's Resolution

3- 2 - 1 Happy New Year Mind Readers!

Wait, what, we are going into the third week of January. The plan was to get this one out to you sooner, but like many New Year's Resolutions it was broken before it started. Luckily this is the perfect set-up for the subject of my new post. Thank you laziness.

If I would have stuck to all my New Year's resolutions, at this point in my life I would be living in Switzerland and dating International Supermodel Heidi Klum. My best selling autobiography "Justin-In-Time: Tales from the World's Most Interesting Man" would be the Time's Bestseller; JHarp and the Truth's album "Pick Up Your Mind because it was just Blown" would be triple platinum; and my invention the "Backwards Snuggie" aka "the robe" would be dominating infomercials. My other notable achievements would have included: Cover of Men's Health, GQ's Man of the Year, Designated Hitter for the Yankee's, and the guy who saved a baby monkey from a shark tank. Although theses dreams have not yet come true, I will still strenuously strive towards these goals. But, I will probably start on it tomorrow because I have like four seasons of "Dexter" to catch up on.

After many failed resolutions, I decided to shoot for the clouds this year and lower my standards of success. These are some sure-fire ways to achieve goals, and I encourage you to set new resolutions as well. For example, instead of getting a six-pack this year, I am going to try to eat less than a whole pizza on a Tuesdays. Instead of becoming an intellectual by reading all the classics, I will read an entire chapter book, this year (That doesn't feature the Berenstain Bears.) Instead of dating a super hot girlfriend, I might login to Match.com. Those are just a few great examples of goals I really think I can achieve. Lets be realistic I'm not going to become a Abercrombie model, but if I eat enough McNuggets "Plus Size Male Modle" isn't out of the question. I guess what I am really trying to say is don't be afraid to dream.

Thank you Mind Readers. It feels so good to be back. Let me know how your new resolutions go. One of my friends has already taken the lead. His goal is to move from the drive-through to the cash register. Thanks for reading and remember the world is laughing at you so you better laugh back.

JHarp